How Much is Too Much?
As a caregiver, you might not realize your behavior has changed due to the demands of caregiving, but you can be certain your close friends and relatives will pick up on it. Luckily, your friends and family can be your greatest supporters during the caregiving journey.
Friends and family are often the first ones to notice that your behavior is different, so here is a short list of behaviors that may indicate burnout and ways to avoid them in your life.
You are displaying a snappy, short temper
When we try to do too much and are feeling overwhelmed, we often lash out at those around us. If you find yourself being grumpy or snippy, having a short fuse or getting easily frustrated with people and life, you may be experiencing caregiver overload.
To combat this behavior, take a deep breath and count to 10 before reacting to any situation. Those 10 seconds can give you a much-needed chance to take a mental health break and recharge. Simply counting to 10 is also a great way to start a meditation practice when feeling life is getting out of hand. Imagine you are in a happy place and breathe in and out for 10 seconds, or longer. It will help you be better prepared to handle stressful situations with grace.
You are withdrawing from social and family gatherings
If you are feeling that you just do not have the energy or desire to attend family gatherings or meet up with friends for coffee or dinner, you may be experiencing caregiver burnout. Caregivers often take on way more responsibilities than they can handle, leaving them feeling that they have no time for themselves. This can lead to feelings of sadness and even depression.
Self-care is not selfish. Your loved one may need you, but you also need to be healthy and happy to be the best caregiver you can be. That does not mean you have to be “on” 24/7. Ask for a relative or close friends to help by buying groceries and delivering them to you, cooking a meal for you one night a week, helping you with caregiving duties one or two nights a week and taking your loved one out once a week so you can get a break. The little things matter to caregivers and any help is appreciated.
You are getting sick often and not fully recovering
Burnout results in a lowered immune system, making you a target for illness. According to Health Central, long-term caregiving can shorten your life by about eight years. That’s a sobering statistic, and one that needs to change. If you find yourself getting sick a lot or never fully feeling 100%, you may need to take some time off to regroup.
The best caregiver is a healthy caregiver. If you are sick, you can’t fully care for your loved one. And being sick around an older adult can pose a threat to them too. It’s common for caregivers to put their loved one above themselves, but that is a slippery slope and can backfire. Take time for yourself by asking friends and family to take over caregiving duties one day a week, so you can attend an exercise class, take a hike, get a massage, read a book or just sleep in.
Caregiving is not for the faint of heart. It’s hard work and can be a rollercoaster of emotions. But you can handle it with a little self-care, and a little help from your friends and family.