Carenote from T.

September 25, 2017

12:00 AM

Welcome to CareNotes. In this special section we will feature a reader's letter and provide an opportunity for an interactive exchange that will help find some answers and possible solutions to concerns.

Carenote From T.

Mom has dementia..short term memory is gone.. but yet when I tell her something that did happen (like at the Doctor's office) she gets upset and says NO..... Where was I? etc.....but she knows she forgets things too. She also thinks I should go to work, home, her house.....that's it!! She is jealous when I do my running around for things I need to do on Saturdays (she gets too tired to go), but she does get out of the house. (She often chooses not to, but then complains about not being able to go)

So far she is able to live alone (I live next door and check on her often) I also take care of a handicap son......He lives on the other side of Mom's!! He is deaf, has seizures, and is mentally challenged (I do have some outside help with him-but not a lot) Any suggestions on how to make life easier for Mom?

Thank you .

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Jealousy and Dementia

1) Stop telling her things. If she can't remember them, why bring them up?
2) Doing the above may lessen her anxiety and loss of self-confidence, but it will take a while. She doesn't feel comfortable going out and it may be because of this confidence issue rather than exhaustion. Try to figure out when she is most active and has the most energy. Take her out then for short trips.
3) When you have to (or want to) go out on a Saturday, just do it. Don't tell her about it. If she notices, tell her it was work related. She seems to be somewhat independent, so you may need to be sneaky.
4) Can you get help for her, say a companion for a few hours on Saturday? User her dime, of course.

Patricia more than 8 years ago