In Celebration of Stroke Caregivers

Gary Barg, Editor-in-Chief

One of the most interesting things I have learned from speaking with family caregivers around the country over these past 24 years is that, although so many aspects of caregiving are similar no matter what the disease or illness our loved ones face—stress, medication management, partnering with physicians, communicating with our loved ones, (did I mention STRESS?), some situations are intrinsically different.

For example, I do love speaking with caregivers of loved ones living with strokes, since this is one healthcare situation where our loved ones can potentially regain their strength and functional abilities to extraordinary degrees these days.

One of my neighbors when I was growing up is a member of a large stroke support group that I have had the honor to speak with a few times. Herb is a fiercely independent man, and always had the coolest house to visit for the kids in the neighborhood. With an extensive jazz collection and a full drum set, it was like living next door to Buddy Rich.

Herb battled the effects of his stroke with the same determination that he used to beat on the drums in that recreation room, and with the same class and cool demeanor. His wife, Estelle, was a true partner in care as she knew how to give him his space and when to step in for some moral and physical support.

One of the reasons I believe they did so well is that they acted as a team. When Estelle had to step in and take on some of the roles that Herb traditionally filled during their 50-year marriage, he was gracious and helped as much as he could. When he was once again well enough to take back some of these roles, she worked with him to do so. They have kept their sense of humor (which they always had in abundance), were active members in their support group and always sought out the latest information regarding stroke rehabilitation options.

As in everything having to do with caring for our loved ones and clients, it is up to us to stay apprised of the latest advances and, as any good fearless caregiver knows, never stop asking questions.

May is Stroke Awareness Month. Please take our stroke survey.

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Awareness and attitude helps too

My father had a massive brain stroke and survived six pretty good years after that regaining many of his capabilities except for ambulation. Only reason he passed away was from one bad fall that broke his back. My mother cared for him and was awesome. They could have used some of the words of wisdom and inspiration in this article as could of, most importantly awareness and attitude. Though they loved and respected each other very much, and my mother was an incredible caregiver, my father's souring attitude did not play well in his rehab to walk better and they would argue or my mother ignored him. My mother's lack of knowledge to get support and work with him hindered his progress as well. The frequent falls finally caught up to him and he had one bad one breaking his back. I wish I knew more then to have supported both of them even from long distance. At first my father had a great attitude--I had him walking with a cane. But my next visit three months later he was using a walker and a wheelchair and never a cane again. Thanks for the great story.

Zachary Demopoulos more than 5 years ago

Stroke

I read Zachary's story with great interest as I too have a family member (spouse) who suffered from a stroke 13 year ago and has resigned herself to now sitting in a wheelchair as a result of an ulcer that developed on her foot. The fact that she was immobile for six months really set her back. She has been receiving PT & OT, but balance is an issue and honestly, she doesn't seem to be in any hurry to walk again independently. Oh, and lost 95% of her speech and never regained it. Top all of this off with the fact that I work full time- her stroke was in 2006 at age 52. Just thought I'd share a glimpse of what we call our new reality.

Peter Mulrey more than 4 years ago