One of the (and there are oh so many), challenges we face as family caregivers is that many of the most important resources at our disposal as we care for our loved ones have unfamiliar and difficult names. Some that come to mind are Long-Term-Care Ombudsman, Hospice and Palliative Care. One of the few rules we have at the Fearless Caregiver conferences is that we never let an unfamiliar word or acronym go unchallenged.
Another word (and one of my favorites) is Respite. Which is the much-needed rest that, hopefully, all caregivers take to help them rest as they care for their loved ones. In fact, the Latin origins of the word mean “To turn around and look at”, which is something that cannot help but make us better stewards of our loved one’s care.
Respite can also mean putting together a team to help take on some of the many roles you face on a daily basis to help you catch your breath.
But why listen to me. When I wrote about respite recently, I heard from the real experts, our fellow caregivers with some of their terrific tips:
Walking each morning
I walk about two or more miles early every morning with a neighbor and our dogs. We meet daily and walk, talk, and laugh regardless of rain, snow, or freezing temperatures. My husband sleeps while we walk. I take my phone and leave my husband’s phone with my number ready to be called should he need me. I’m installing a camera so I can check him on my phone while we walk. - Sherry
No man is an island...
My wife has been sick with brain cancer for 16 years, but the past 2 years have been very hard on her. Dementia settled in and has almost completely taken over. For 15 months I've been taking care of her at home, under hospice protocol. I'm not able to take nearly as much personal time as I know that I need, but I do have friends who watch her 2 mornings a week for 3 hours, each time. - Mike
Taking time for me
I work full time and care for my mom full time. I don’t have a support system so when I am not working I am taking care of her. We do have an aide through Medicaid for the hours I work. Last week being Thanksgiving the aide said she was not coming on Thanksgiving. And then asked do you really need me on Friday since you are off? I said I was hoping to do some Black Friday shopping to which she stared at me like I was being selfish. My first instinct was to apologize and say it was ok. But for once the “selfish” side of my brain took over and said yes you have to come! I also called the agency and asked for a substitute aide on Thanksgiving and not only did they find someone she was wonderful! - Cindy
Sounds like wisdom to me!
Share your experience. How do you take care of yourself? Tell us in the comments box below