YOU are the difference
As the height of the holiday season rapidly approaches, I start to think about one of my all-time favorite holiday movies It’s a Wonderful Life. ”The films protagonist George, played to perfection by Jimmy Stewart, is disheartened about how his life had turned out and certain in the knowledge that it would make no big difference if he had never been born.
Clarence the Angel, who was seeking his wings, granted George his wish. And presto, George was never born. The moral, of course, is that George actually touched so many people in his life that without him the world would be a lesser place. His existence, no matter how useless he thought it was, made a positive difference to a wide array of folks.
My point is that every time I see this movie, I think of you. Even if I don’t know you personally, I do know that your existence, your heart and soul have such a profound effect on so many more people than just the loved one for whom you care.
I sometimes tell the story about some folks I know whose idea of caregiving was to swoop into town once a year, drive our mutual loved ones up to a fast food window and then just as fast as the food disappeared, so did they. It never surprised me when they would have telephonic conversations with my mom, casually explaining to her how little effort there was to this caregiving thing and asking why she was so concerned and working so hard.
I would respond to them on these chats with mom by explaining that there as a great lump of coal waiting for them in their psychic stockings if they did not change their ways. Furthermore, it was easy to foretell (just as Ebenezer Scrooge was warned by the Ghost of Christmas Future) exactly how their kids would be caring for them, if that time ever came.
It was, in fact, by watching my mother care for first my dad and then my grandparents; that my eyes were opened to the loving labors of family caregivers and for that my life was forever changed for the better.
So, the next time you find yourself asking “What’s the difference?” please be assured that for me and for so very many people in your life... YOU are the difference.
And just like Clarence the Angel in It’s A Wonderful Life, I can tell you with absolute certainty that you have already received your wings.
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