Fearless Caregiver Profile: LUCILLE PAYNE

How did you become the caregiver for your loved one?

I am caregiver to my husband who has Lewy Bodies Dementia, so by default/choice.

Has your relationship changed with the loved one that you are caring for? If so how?

Everything has changed. The first greatest change was having to do all the diving. Add to that being directionally challenged. For while he retained his awesome sense of direction. Soon it became apparent I could no longer trust his directions

What is the hardest thing about being a caregiver and the most rewarding thing?

I find the lack of REM sleep what I miss most. Through this experience I have learned to choose what needs my close attention and what matters. To be calm, just clean it up, being upset changes nothing. He does not understand there is no reasoning.

What advice would you give to other caregivers?

Take mini respites. Get up earlier for quiet time; stay up later to regroup. Trust Abba in all things. Know that this experience is a learning circle, not a curve, as there is not end to the learning.

In ten words or less, what has caregiving taught you?

Patience, calmness, anticipation, make mistakes only once, attentiveness, being informed

Describe a situation where being a Fearless Caregiver helped you succeed?

As caregiver I maintain the health of my husband. I have read an learned and I don't let anyone press me into doing what I don't think is right for him or me.

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Fearless Caregiver Profile: Join us as we celebrate Fearless Caregivers sharing personal stories as we care for our loved ones. Read this week’s Fearless Caregiver Profile and feel free to add your profile as well, so we can learn from and share with our fellow caregivers.