Tips for Spousal Caregivers

Alzheimer’s disease, the most prominent form of dementia, is a progressive and degenerative mental disorder that affects cognitive function, memory, and even physical attributes. In general, dementia is a blanket term used to refer to a group of symptoms that involve the loss of cognitive functioning and behavioral abilities that interfere with daily life. Alzheimer’s disease is just one of many forms of dementia. Unfortunately, Alzheimer’s and other forms of dementia is something that primarily affects older individuals and seniors.

Because these disorders are progressive, symptoms may start small but as time passes, they can become more and more severe and lead to problems performing day-to-day tasks. If this occurs, dementia patients will likely have to enlist the help of a caregiver or an assisted living facility.

For many married couples, when a husband or wife begins to show signs of serious dementia the spouse will oftentimes become the caregiver for their loved one. With that said, dementia caregiving can be a burdensome thing and lead to many challenges and obstacles in a relationship. If you don’t know how to navigate the issues properly, it can lead to problems and rifts in the relationship.

Common Relationship Problems

For many, these problems in the relationship can lead to tension and even loss of relationships. Dementia is stressful, not only for the patient but for the caregiver as well. In fact, caregivers for those with dementia are at an increased risk of stress, depression, and many other health complications.

The Journal of Family Nursing conducted a study and overview of spousal caregiving to look at some of the common problems in the relationships that led to issues.

Some of the common themes in testimonies that they received found communication problems like not being able to talk and or socialize. Moreover, when the disorders got in the way of plans that they’ve had for a long time, such as travel, it can dramatically interfere with the relationship. Agitation, a common symptom of dementia, is another problem that often interferes with and can lead to strained relationships.

When a spouse cares for their loved one with Alzheimer’s disease, it can lead to the spouse caregiver feeling overburdened and even depressed. This can work to exacerbate the problems between the couple and create a rift in the relationship that can sometimes be irreparable.

Some testimonies from the study found that many couples ended up losing their relationship.

“It’s like he doesn’t…have anything to offer… it’s…it’s different,” One testimony read. “We had planned to travel some after he retired... It’s a lot different… And just our life has changed dramatically. And it will continue to. We have more bad days than good days now…you just try to make the best of it and go on.”

Despite these common problems that many spousal caregivers face, there are ways to improve the outcome and hopefully avoid detrimental effects on the relationship.

Tips for Spousal Caregiving

According to a report from the University of Buffalo, spouses becoming caregivers for their ailing partners is quite common in America.

The study found that when caregivers believe that their help is appreciated it leads to increased health benefits and happier moods. This means that clear and open communication with loved ones suffering from dementia can help.

“This study adds to a growing body of evidence showing that it is important to target emotional communication between spouses in daily support interactions to improve psychological well-being in the context of chronic conditions and disability,” the report said.

Moreover, one of the things that can often lead to tension in the relationship is caregiver stress. Caregiver stress is a problem that many caregivers deal with in which they experience issues such as impatience, difficulty sleeping, loss of appetite, changes in mood, and more. Unfortunately, these issues can cause caregivers to take their frustrations out on their spouse, putting more tension on the relationship.

Caregivers can make a few lifestyle changes to help reduce their levels of stress. For example, getting a well-balanced diet and proper exercise will help improve mental and physical health. Caregivers can also make these lifestyle changes along with their partner, which will not only improve their mood but can help to strengthen and solidify the relationship between the spouses.

Dementia poses a number of problems for the patient and the caregiver, especially if the caregiver is a spouse, it can lead to rifts in the relationship. Caring for a loved one with dementia or Alzheimer’s may be one of the most difficult challenges you face, hopefully, these tips can help you and your loved one find the best way to work through the challenges and keep a strong relationship.