3 Ways to Deal with a Loved One’s Hoarding

When it comes to their loved ones, family caregivers are often prepared to deal with the stereotypical effects of aging: memory loss, mobility issues, frailty; however, sometimes they can be at a loss to deal with unexpected issues.

For example: How do you deal with loved ones who have begun exhibiting hoarding behavior?

In seniors, this tends to be associated with anxiety, dementia or obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD). The reasons behind hoarding behavior in seniors are varied. For some, as their memories fade, physical possessions provide a link to the past that they fear losing. For others, particularly those without social interaction, their possessions become their only anchor to the world.

Hoarding behavior goes beyond just collecting mementos of the past. The homes of loved ones exhibiting hoarding behavior will often be filled with clutter or even trash that they find it difficult or impossible to discard. The hoarded items eventually become a health or fire hazard. The home may become filled to the walls, with only narrow pathways to navigate from room to room.

When hoarding reaches unhealthy levels, it’s up to the senior’s loved ones to intervene, but this is a delicate process that can backfire if approached incorrectly. Here are three ways to deal with your aging loved one’s hoarding.

1) Talk to a Doctor

It’s important to remember that the body is not separate from the brain. Underlying health conditions can lead to mental health problems, too. The first step in addressing your loved one’s hoarding is to talk with their doctor. Let their healthcare providers know about your concerns, then schedule a visit for a check-up if it’s safe to do so in your area. If office visits aren’t advised due to the COVID-19 pandemic, consider a telehealth appointment.

Anxiety disorders in seniors often coincide with other problems like heart disease, diabetes and depression. Some medications can also have anxiety as a side effect. Often, treating these conditions will also make the hoarding behavior easier to address. Medication and psychotherapy may be recommended to help your loved one.

2) Get Involved

The seniors who most often develop hoarding tendencies are those who are isolated and alone. Isolation worsens the conditions that can lead to hoarding, including anxiety and depression. A hoarding senior will often self-isolate out of paranoia or shame.

Make sure you and other family members are frequently checking in, visiting, and getting your loved one involved in your lives if possible. This will help you identify the signs of hoarding before they get out of control, and build trust with your loved one to get them the help they need. If you can’t visit, consider reaching out to a home care service to do so.

3) Be Patient

It is undeniably difficult to see an aging loved one engaging in hoarding behavior, often actively resisting help or becoming combative when help is offered. But remember that this behavior is not intentional. There is no easy on/off switch for hoarding. Those coping with mental health disorders often want to change the behavior but cannot without professional help.

Be patient and compassionate with your loved one. Celebrate small victories, like clearing one surface or throwing out one or two items. These steps are phenomenally difficult for them, and their resistance should not be taken personally.

Caring for an aging loved one is a challenging task, but it is also rewarding. Making sure your loved one’s needs are met gives both of you peace of mind. When you encounter an issue like hoarding behavior, it’s important to reach out to healthcare professionals to find the most effective solutions. Together, you can ensure that your loved one is safe, happy and healthy.