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FROM THE EDITOR'S PEN  / Plan, Plan, Plan /  Editorial List

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 Plan, Plan, Plan

Last week I wrote about how having your own end of life planning in place being the greatest gift that you can leave your family.

Here is another gift from a family caregiver:

Dear Gary,

I am still receiving your beautiful newsletter.  Please keep up all the hard work you and your staff are doing.

I sat down with my husband and made our plans for our deaths, both his and mine.  There was no arguing with our 6 children.  We had everything planned and on paper.  Wills were done, directives were completed.  I did this because I have seen so many families come apart after the funeral.  This way there was no question as to what comes next, we planned for what comes next.

I did this because my mother's funeral wasn't a disaster but it was confusing.  I was asked by my sister and our dad, "What was mom's favorite religious song for her funeral?"  I was blown away.  Here were 2 people, my dad who lived with her over 50 years, and my sister who lived 4 miles away from mom and dad.  Yet neither had any idea of what song she would want played.  No one had ever sat down and asked the serious questions in their lives. 

I ask for those of you who have not done this - just do it.  Yes, it is difficult but it's more difficult when no one knows what you want after your death.

My funeral is now being paid for, by me.  All funeral expenses and all instructions for my funeral are on paper, notarized and complete.  I've even written out an addendum to my will so that everything I have valued will go to the person I have named.

Today's Caregiver Family Checklist:


Gary Barg

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