For the past five years, I have had the
responsibility of my parents.
The first situation was having my mom
settled in a care home. She had
dementia and was a danger to herself and my
dad. It was a difficult struggle with
my dad and my brother to get them to
recognize the need She is doing much
better, but my brother refuses any attempt
to keep him involved in the decisions.
My dad has chosen to stay in his home.
He is 92 now and is fast getting to the
point he needs more help, but wonít allow
anyone but me or my daughter in. He is
worried his stuff will be taken; when we
have had outside help, it has been.
My husband was diagnosed with rectal
cancer three years ago and has to wear a
colostomy bag. His personal hygiene is
disgusting. He also shows signs of
approaching mental forgetfulness.
One of my children is close by, but two
are in distant parts of the country.
Even though I have been through counseling
and have been going to a caregiversí group,
my anger is so strong, I can hardly control
it at times and I want to stay in bed as
much as I am able. Financially, we are
not in a good place, so I just canít take
off on a holiday if I want to, even if I
could leave my father without support.
How does one overcome this anger that I
am sure others have. I am now in my
70s. I am not looking forward to living like
this and don't know how to change. I
have hobbies which help; but increasingly, I
don't want to see people, either, as people
my age all have problems
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