Coping with my dear husband who is 84, 10 years
older than I. He has severe polyneuropathy and
possibly Parkinson's. I thank God he has his mind. We need a
caregiver because I cannot hold him if he falls. He needs to
be held onto by a gait belt whenever he moves. My biggest
fear is financial; just seeing to his personal needs (he is
also post-op bypass) demands four hours of time at least. I
am fighting depression, resentment, anger, guilt, and grief
to see him like this. These are the golden years?
Reply to Letter | View Comments
| Past Carenotes |
Time: 01:54 PM
I fully understand what you are going thru..and the financial part also. I have been taking care of my husband for 12 years..who has Parkinson, dementia, neuropathy badly, lewdy bdy. I look for people
with whom I can communicate.
Time: 01:36 PM
Have you considered using a wheelchair part-time, for the times that your husband is most likely to fall or to give you a break? You can't possibly hold him if he falls. All you can do without hurting yourself is to guide him down to minimize injury. Consider the intermittant use of a heavy duty walker and/or wheelchair. Your husband should understand the need, and it doesn't mean he can't ever walk, just that you pick the times.
Location: South Florida
Time: 08:11 AM
Please check out the following website. I don't know where you live, but here in south Florida there are many organizations that can offer assistance for little, if any, money. I'm also the principal caregiver for my 85 year old husband with advanced Parkinson's and dementia. He also went through bypass surgery a few years ago and is totally immobile, incontinent and unable to communicate intelligently. I don't have a lot of money, but fortunately, I am able to pay for an aide a few hours a day to take care of his personal hygiene, something I could not do without assistanc, so in that respect I am very fortunate.
Time: 09:43 AM
M, There are many home care agencies that you can call to help you with caregiving. What you need is a one on one caregiver to come into your home to help. You can call your state agency on aging to give you a list of home care agencies. You need to have some down time. I hear that you want to keep him at home. I commend you for that. You also need to find a caregivers support group in your area. Call your local senior center they are a great reference center. Call your town social worker. They can refer you to agencies and get paper work started for you for help through the state. I wish you luck. Sue
Name: Marc A
Time: 06:13 AM
There are so many caregivers who are in need of help but lack the resources to pay for it. Is your husband a veteran? If so, he may qualify for a non-service connected pension from the VA to help you pay for care. If you'd like more information, call 866-507-0003 and I'd be happy to help if I can. Ask for Marc.