The New Question

I had a terrific time during my mini-swing through Texas last week. Thanks to the good folks at The Seniors Place in Houston and the Capital Area Council of Governments Area Agency on Aging in Austin, for your hospitality.  I learned enough for a handful of newsletters in both cities, but one thing that stands out is that there seems to have been a definite change in the topic of The Question.  The Question refers to the topic during a caregiving events question and answer period that stops all other lines of inquiry for at least a half an hour.  For years, The Question has always been about (to paraphrase) “How do I get Mom/Dad to stop driving?”  I learned years ago at our Fearless Caregiver conferences to save all driving questions for the last portion of the session, in order for any other topic to see the light of day.  In Austin, at the “Striking-A-Balance” conference, I received confirmation that The Question has shifted to – “How do I get my family members to help as I care for Mom/Dad?”   Even though there was a board certified elder care attorney on the panel, this new question even threatened to overpower the legal issues.  As I always say, “if you want to get a laugh out of a roomful of family caregivers, tell them that you know how easy it is to get help from their other family members.”  The good thing is when you get a group of caregivers together; you are dealing with a whole lot of wisdom sharing.  I would like to test this theory even further and ask you to share your tips for getting help from family member/friends as you care for your loved ones.    

Unless of course, you are just looking for a good chuckle from your fellow caregivers.

My tips for family support        

Take care
Gary Barg
Editor-in-Chief
gary@caregiver.com

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My Mom has severely prolapsed uterus issue causing bleeding. Caring for her at home, this is serious, of course. She's in her 90's, and docs don't want to do surgery to remove uterus, which in its present state would be (we believe) actually an easy task. It's the LIABILITY they're afraid of without using the word. Interestingly, she underwent 2 procedures this year (same hospital) under General Anesthesia, coming out of it in half hour, and her vitals are GOOD! So, Mom now lies in hospital near discharge - without having the problem attended to as planned. Only suggestion is a pessary - how can a dementia patient who can't properly voice comfort/discomfort or who gets extremely agitated during a transport handle regular doc office visits for this? Any suggestions / advice?   Answer This Week's CareNote: carenotes/2006/index.htm
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