The Littlest Caregivers

The first time I heard about children serving in the role of family caregiver, was in conversation with my college roommate, decades before I knew that my life’s work would revolve around supporting family caregivers. 

One cool clear evening in Tallahassee, Florida where we were attending school, he told me the story of his childhood.  From the age of ten, he had become defacto primary caregiver for his father, mother and sister, each of whom was living with debilitating illnesses. I sat stunned as he recounted the challenges he had been dealing with only a few years earlier and how fast he had to face real life tests when most of his contemporaries were just worrying about passing the next algebra test.

This past week, as I attended the National Council on Aging/ American Society on Aging Conference in Anaheim, California, many of my conversations with others involved in caregiver support centered around the effect that caregiving has on the entire family.  So many times I am reminded that caregiving is actually an issue which affects every member of the family and none more than the children who are caregiving.

My good friend, Dr. Connie Siskowski, of the Caregiving Youth Project conducted a survey distributed to 54 Palm Beach County middle and high schools, show that, “out of 11,029 middle and high school students being asked if they had a family health situation at home, almost 70% indicated that there was someone with a specific medical condition living with them or close by, and that, strikingly “Ninety percent said they were participating in care.”

Caregiving is truly a family affair and we need to make sure that we are all paying attention to the needs of even the littlest caregivers.

Caregiving Youth Project    

Take care
Gary Barg
Editor-in-Chief
gary@caregiver.com

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Carenotes
I have been taking care of my father-in-law who has MS for 13 years. He has been totally bed ridden for at least 10 of those years. He has physically gone down hill, like can hardly feed himself, has a very hard time doing anything with his hand, the other hand is totally useless. I have been sleeping on the couch outside his room since October 2005. I am totally burnt out. He went into the hospital last week for surgery on arteries because he has no blood flow to his legs. He is now in a nursing home for the recovery. My husband and I just are tired and my children have suffered through all of this because my father-in-law is very demanding and feels he has been doing us a favor all these years. His mind is still pretty clear. This is our home and we want to know, can we refuse to take him back here? He is very difficult. I believe that I should have a right not to have to take care of him. I feel terrible but I just can't. What do we do? Answer This Week's CareNote: carenotes/2006/index.htm
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